Author Heather Hogan's Blogs...

Falls Must Haves.....

2009-09-08T08:49:00.000-07:00

Fall is my favorite time of the year! The leaves start changing from a dark or even neon green to my favorite colors....different shades of orange, red, and yellow. The air in the mornings and evenings is crisp and refreshing. As a child, I used to love the smell of burning leaves permeating through my neighborhood. We all head to the pumpkin farms to buy our pumpkins to carve into Halloween jack-o-lanterns. The kids are back to school and the best part is, fall fashions rock!

One of my favorites this season is the cropped flat boots! They look awesome with skinny jeans or leggings. You can wear a boot leg jean with them, but you lose the effect of the style of the boot between the heel and the opening of the rugged or sleek boot. But what does work is taking your denim and rolling them up to show the boot. The look is very hot! You can go rock-star glam with this look, or just hip and cool.

Booties is another alternative to get a chic and hip look. It is an ankle boot that can be worn with anything, including skirts. Ankle boots are sexy, and quite comfortable! Check out the leather "fiddle" ankle boot at www.habitatshoes.com. They have a great price point at $110 a pair! You can't beat that!

I love drawstring bags this year! They are fabulous. They take on a bucket style look and go really well paired with your cropped flat boot. One of my favorites is the leather Tess bag. It is pricey at $550. Go to www.rebeccaminkoff.com to check out the style and then search more affordable places, like Target, to copy the look!

Vests are huge this year! I am a vest chick, love them! I am not talking about North Face puffer vests, no, hip sweater vests, and vests that look great with a fitted white tee or loose tee underneath the piece. If you are going out, go for a cool cami or a tank. Sweater vests are great for a fall night, it is not cold enough for the jacket, but a vest is perfect.

Skinny trousers are in. Ladies, this is a hard look to pull off. You might want to skip it because I don't think it will be back next year! They do look hot with a pair of booties, and rockin sweater or shirt to complete the outfit, however, only go for this if you have extra funds for the season!

Another love affair I am having at the moment is the oversize double-breasted blazer. It will give you a cool and slimming look. Do not pair this with boot leg denim or trousers. You have to go with the skinny jean or leggings. You won't be disappointed.

I love dresses and boots together! This season the dresses are hot! Minidresses with tights and a rockin heel screams "I am hot and confident." Go for it! If you don't feel you have the legs to pull this off try a longer hemline, just don't go below the knee!

A must this season is the plaid shirt. Ladies you can make this shirt turn you into a hot mama lust machine!You don't need to spend the bank on this shirt, head to Sears or JC Penneys, just pick one up and get your hottest pair of jeans out and work the look.

The worn in jean is in this year. The plaid shirt worn this style of denim screams I am one hot wholesome babe.

Layering is always a great idea in fall. It creates depth to your look and style. There is a fine line between layering and looking like the pillsbury dough boy!

A fitted leather jacket is always a hot look. I picked up my black fitted leather biker jacket seven years ago from Banana Republic for $550 and still wear it all season and it still looks amazing. That jacket will last another seven years. Everytime I put it on I feel hip and sensational. Pick one up for yourself, you won't regret it.

Leopard is back again. You have to be careful with this look and you must be confident. Don't go for an oversized jacket or leggings! A subtle cardigan or scarf is perfect to accent your outfit. You can quickly go from hip to jungle ready if you add to much safari material!

Finally the colors I love for fall are; camel, dark purple, black and white of course, fuschia and my favorite fall color that takes us through winter is grey!

I Have Embraced My Age

2009-09-05T07:56:00.000-07:00

I will be forty in less than six months and do not feel like I am approaching my fourth decade on planet earth. No, I feel at times, like I am still in my twenties. My workouts are still hard, sweaty, and fastidious, I still dance like I am in college, I enjoy nature like an eight year old, I love stupid jokes, to make funny faces, to burp so loud my children and I fall to the floor laughing, but I finally have felt my age in two instances in the past week. And boy did it feel good!

While writing is my passion and one day I hope it can afford me the life I would love to give my children, I miss being in fashion since the closing of my boutique almost a year ago. My friend Connie is a rep for a fabulous line called Cabi. Over the summer I checked the line out and talked to her in depth about her sales, the line, and how much she loves what she is doing.

I was longing to be back in the world where I am very good at what I do, where I find great joy and satisfaction,; styling people to look their best!

I decided I wanted to be a personal stylist at Nordstrom. Nordstrom has stability and great products! I know, this economy is not begging for stylist when no one is shopping! I didn't care. I decided Nordstrom needed me and I needed them.

Two Mondays ago I woke up, showered, picked out a rockin outfit and went down to Walnut Creek, CA's Nordstrom. Oh, I walked in there and took a deep breath and smelled the scent of leather from handbags, and salon shoes, mixed in with perfume from the fragance counters, and thought, "Yep, this is where I want to be!"

I walked up to human resources and told them I would like to apply for a job as a stylist. She kind of looked up at me and told me I had to apply online, and I there I would be a listing of jobs. I said thank you and left.

Here is where I embrace my age; I walked over to personal touch, met with the manager, of the stylists, told her I really wanted to work in this department, I told her why I was so qualified for this job, and she set up an interview with me for the following Wednesday.

I would never have done that in my twenties or early thirties. With age comes confidence and wisdom and boy do I love it!

I met with Cheryl this past Wednesday. I was hired. She told me in eighteen years she has never hired a stylist outside of Nordstrom. Normally, they hire from within and you have to have two years experience on the floor and be a top producer!

Well, my age helped me to help Cheryl, the manager, think outside the box! I walked into that interview confident, strong, and very sure of who I am and what I want. I have earned those qualities. I love almost being 40! I never want to go back.

Yesterday, I had to meet with the assistant manager of human resources. Once again, my confidence and wisdom seeped through my pores. Do you know how great it is to not be twenty, nervous, and unsure of yourself? Obviously, we all have to go through our youth and learn our lessons, and I still have a ton of lessons to learn, but to be able to nail an interview, two, and realize who I am and what I am about and my capabilities is a powerful feeling.

Look out 40's, here I come!

Unconditional Love.....

2009-08-12T08:27:00.000-07:00

Do you believe in unconditional love? You know, the kind of love that can with stand any sort of treason or atrocity committed against you by the one you supposedly love unconditionally. I used to believe in unconditional love, but not anymore. I believe it exists, but I also believe it is a love that only a parent and child can attain. There is one more relationship that that sort of bond and love contain. I will get to that in a second.

Let me give you my definition of unconditional love. Unconditional love means, the person whom you love unconditionally can cause irreversible harm to you or a loved one, can continuously hurt you emotionally and physically, can disappoint you in great magnitude and on multiple occasions, yet, you continue to love that person, nurture them, and take them back in your life. Under those circumstances, very few people can garner unconditional love.

Unless of course, you are a parent. I can tell you with 100% conviction in my heart I love my children unconditionally. No matter what they do, I will always be there for them, and never, ever stop loving them. My children are my life, I breathe the air simply because I have them, and I never stop loving them even for a second! They can cause the world harm in a terrorist act and I would still forgive them and love them. I would not turn my back on them. I would love them and show them compassion while trying to reach them mentally to figure out why they have committed the acts they have committed.

At times we get angry at God when our life isn't going so well. We think to ourselves, "Where are you God? Why is this happening?" Anything bad in our life is happening because God loves us so much, unconditionally, and needs to teach his child or children, us, a lesson. Very much the same way that when our children screw up, as hard as it is, we must punish them, and hope they learn the lesson. If they learn their lesson, they are rewarded with our love, help, and nurturing. When I learn my lessons in life, doors open for me. I know God is smiling, for he didn't want to punish me, but I am His child and He needs to guide and love me.

I believe the one person that loves us unconditionally, and waits paitently for us to come to Him, is God! It is the same way you love your children. I am going to end with a quote from Kryon, "When you call upon the love of God and exercise pure intent, there will be miracles."

Choices.......

2009-08-11T08:55:00.000-07:00

Everyday we are met with choices. Choices are not always easy, nor are they supposed to be. As children we start out having to choose the outfit we want to wear to school, and move on to having to choose our friends. From there we have to choose whether or not to cave into peer pressure and do what the rest of the crowd is doing or stand up for ourself and take a stand against what is wrong.

Some choose to go down the right path, while others willingly choose to go down the wrong path. Some don't know which path to choose, they are unsure of themselves, and can't decipher between what is right and what is wrong. Even some choose the wrong side deciding they will just deal with the consequences later.

As parents we are meant to help guide our children to make the right choices. We are to love and nurture them while allowing them to become independent and skillful in everyday decisions. This is not always easy.

I believe we can learn a lot about ourselves by the decisions we make. I always point out what is right or wrong with a decision my child has made. By pointing out the differences between a great decision and a wrong one we are giving the child the tools they need to decipher how to look at a situation, assess the situation, and choose the right path as they continue to grow in age and maturity. I try to never belittle my children's choices. Instead, I help them learn from their decisions.

As an adult, I continue at times to make bad choices. We are all human, no one is perfect and we all have flaws. A bad choice can only harm you if you don't learn from that decision you made. As an adult, I no longer make decisions knowing the consequences are going to come back and bite me in the bum, but I do not feel I assess situations with total clearity at times. I am learning, and growing, but I will never be perfect. I can only do my best, and if you do your best there should be no regrets.

The worst choices we seem to make come when we are under extreme stress from money and outside pressures. We have to learn to step back, take a deep breath, and look at the situation for what it is before we make a detrimental decision that will harm ourselves or others. I am thirty nine and I am still learning this!

I work with my children constantly about life lessons and how the choices they make can profoundly affect them and others. I want them to be able to make better choices than I have as an adult.

I can say this; all of my choices, as well as yours, are your own. Embrace them, if they were great ones, remember them if they were bad ones, and learn from them, and if you made a choice but could have made a better one, remember that the next time the dilemma comes up! Choices and decisions never go away, they just hopefully get easier as you learn and grow in this crazy world!

Wonderful World of Sports.....Ha!

2009-08-07T08:18:00.000-07:00

Lets start today with suspended Cleveland Brown wide receiver Donte Stallworth. Stallworth is momentarily, notice the choice of word, momentarily, suspended from the NFL for killing Mario Reyes. Stallworth was convicted of drunk driving in Miami. He was convicted of drunk driving, not murder or manslaughter, which is what he should have been convicted of considering Mario Reyes is now dead due to the fact that Stallworth was drunk driving and killed him.

In a public statement Stallworth apologized and said he will conduct himself "in a manner that more accurately reflects who I am and meets the high standard expected of all NFL players." I think he believes we all just feel off the back of a pineapple truck heading down the Pali on its way to the West side of Maui and smashed our head into the pavement and lost all ability to decipher between truths and lies. What about an apology to society? He went on to say, "I recognize that there is a difference between the legal standard in my criminal case and the standard to which NFL players are held. It is clear I excercised poor judgement and caused irreparable hard to Mario Reyes, his family, the NFL, its owners, coaches, employees, and to my fellow players."

I am sickened by this statement. What harm did he cause to the owners, employees, and his fellow players? Less money in their pockets? Get off the kiss ass, bullshit train, and tell the truth! I want my job in the NFL paying me millions that I don't deserve back! The guy just might get it back! Goodell will be ruling soon if Stallworth can get his job back. At some point, as fans of the NFL, we have to start letting the NFL know this behavior is unacceptable and we don't want them back!

Meanwhile, Plaxico Burris is up in New York crying a river about his own criminal charges. The good news is, the idiot shot himself in the leg, no one else, while in possession of his illegal weapon. He is facing between 31/2 years and 15 years in prison. His defense is argueing that his fellow NFL comrade in Florida only served 24 days out of a 30 day sentence for killing someone.

I say, laws differ in every state, unfortunately for him, New York is strict on gun laws, and Florida allows NFL players that kill innocent civilians to get off with a band aid to cover up the stink that smells so bad we all need to wear gas masks! I say to Burris, head to Florida to party in a nightclub with an illegal weapon and shoot yourself in the leg down there in the Sunshine State where the laws are for the defendant! Until you do, shut up, and take your sentence!

Moving on, Orlando Magic Rashard Lewis tested positive for an elevated testosterone level, steroids, and was suspended for 10 days. Here we go with Florida and there unfair punishments again. Manny Ramirez, of the Los Angeles dodgers, yes it is MLB not the NBA, tested positive for steroids and was suspended for fifty games.

What does this tell you? It tells me if I am that if I am in the NBA draft I am praying that I am drafted by the Miami Heat or Orlando Magic, if in the NFL draft, I am begging God to be drafted by Miami Dolphins, Tampa Bay Buccaneers, or Jacksonville Jaguars, in MLB, God willing, I will be picked up by the Tampa Bay Devil Rays or Florida Marlins, and finally, if I am a stud hockey player, I will be crossing my sticks that the Florida Panthers or the Tampa Bay Lightning ask me to skate on over to their team! Once there, inject steroids, drive drunk, and kill all you want!

It seems the woman who is accusing Pittsburgh Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger of raping her at a Lake Tahoe resort and casino where she worked has received dozens of threatening and harassing phone calls. I wonder if Kobe Bryant used the same tactics when he got off with raping a woman at an Aspen Hotel. Coincidentally, she was a hotel worker also. This tells me to stay away from guest relations if you have any sort of professional team staying as guests in your establishment!

There are so many stories to be told about professional sports and their serious misdiscretions. It is outrageous and as a fan of sports I am really starting to get sick. Excuse me while I go vomit!

President Obama & First Lady Michelle....Best Dressed List

2009-08-04T16:14:00.000-07:00

So lets see, the economy is tanking, people are losing their homes, can't buy food, the homeless rate is going up, the rich are getting richer, the poor are getting poorer, the middle class is being wiped out, BUT President Obama made his debut on Vanity Fair's Best-Dressed List. Lets not forget first lady Michelle, this his her third year in a row! Wow, way to go Michelle!

It turns out Michelle is so popular with the fashionistas that she "got more votes than any other person this year or any year-she's that popular." Where was she when my women's upscale boutique Sorelle was going bankrupt in this economy? She could have shopped online and bought clothes from me! Too late now, the store went down almost a year ago, but there are still stores and people out there to save.

The good news is, "She has brought back the dress, she turned the planet into her runway." Oh good, my runway is now the aisles at Food Maxx, great prices, good fruit, and I am always wearing my latest fashions to be seen in the produce department!

I know too many people that are losing their homes, trying to figure out how to get by and stay afloat here in California to really worry about the latest list of best dressed people in the DC area. People do crazy things when they are facing bankruptcy, and a report like this, that the President and his wife are spreading their fashion wings in the White House, may make someone's bat wings expand even further!

Lets be honest, the economy is depressing. I am an anxious person at times, and I am now even more anxious. Maybe something like this list is supposed to take us away from our woes for a moment. Well, it didn't work. I am now dreaming about Nordstrom's and how I haven't been there for two years, and screw Michelle!

Brad Pitt made the list too. Angelina was cut off. I guess Brad's accessories edged him out over his wife! Guys, here is the list of accessories to add to your wardrobe so you can get on your wives or girlfriends hot list: hats, no not Cub baseball hats turned backwards, aviator sunglasses, and um, no, not the kind you weld in, and scarves. The scarf can't have anything to do with the Green Bay Packers! They are talking Burberry, you know, the motif going on with beige, red and black!

I am off to get ready for my runway aisle at Food Maxx. I think tonight I am going to show some arm, possibly a bit of leg, and a scarf for sure. Hey, I live in California, we wear scarves and Uggs here all year long!

Sex and Marriage.....It is Necessary

2009-08-02T08:08:00.000-07:00

I have recently been talking to my girlfriends about sex and marriage. Maybe it is because I have been booked on a radio show for February 10 talking about my new book on how to save your marriage, and that book has been on the forefront of my mind a lot.

Before you continue reading, this article is considered R rated. That means under 17 is not permitted without a parent. If you are under 17 go get a parent to read this first!

Ladies and gentlemen sex is extremely important, and an urgent matter to take care of if you are not having it. Yes, there are many other dimensions to a relationship, but the other parts are missing out on being the best they can be if you two do not connect on a sexual level! Sorry, this is a huge reason for infidelity and your house feeling like you live an igloo instead of a warm cozy environment.

Lets try and figure out why you are not having sex. I think body image plays a huge role, exhaustion from work, sometimes medications cause a lack of sex drive, and too many money stresses and outside conflicts due to the economy can definitely cause your sex drive to come a harrowing halt! I know some people were reaching speeds up to 85 when rounding a turn, meaning sex four times a week, and then life got in the way, they skidded to a complete sex stop!

Do not let this happen to you! Sex is an extremely personal and deep emotional bond between two people. That bond just should not be broken. I actually know a woman whom would just want her husband to hurry up and finish so she could get back to picking up the house! Why?

Let me give you the benefits of sex. First of all, it brings you and your spouse closer together, it will never drive you apart, unless you are on top thinking about your TV show you are watching while the one on bottom is looking at you thinking, "He/she is not even interested." If that happens your spouse will start to become very resentful. Also, you do burn calories and it revs up your metabolism for an bit. That after sex glow is a definite plus. I always think I look like I just had a wonderful facial I am glowing so bright.

What happpens when you have sex? You feel a deep connection and bond! I know for me, I look at Mark with nothing but tenderness, lust, and desire. He knows that I am into him and us, the whole entire time. Mark and I can still kiss for hours at a time four years later! Let me tell you, we have a lot of baggage with five kids, a dying economy, two exes, one dog, three cats, fish and a frog that recently died due to malnourishment from not being fed enough crickets! My point is if we can do it you can do it!

When you look at your spouse with love and desire what you will get in return is ten fold. Just start having sex and don't look bored! Listen, I firmly believe that women who masturbate have the best sex lives. That is because if you masturbate you know what it takes to have multiple orgasms. Try it, it works.

I discovered masturbation in the fifth grade. The only reason I did was because I happened to be in a pool near a jet where water was being pushed out in such a force that when it hit my clitoris I knew I had just discovered something so unbelievable that maybe God was shining his light on me just then. Yep, I spent that summer in the pool!

If you are in a situation where you love sex, and your spouse doesn't please go get help. I don't care who you are eventually this will put a huge damper on your marriage. I am sorry, I am not going to lie and say sex is not important, it is!

You might need to take a weekend and go away to jump start the return of sex to your marriage. Go, get a babysitter and head out the door. I am telling you, candles, sexy underwear, music and wine will bring out the sex kitten in you! Try it! What do you have to lose? IF for some reason your spouse doesn't respond, try again. If it has been a long time since you acted like you are a powerful woman whom can control her man with sex than it might take a few times, but try it.

When I say control, I mean, you can get your man to have that look of desire in his face that cannot be mistaken for a look of needing to go to the bathroom. No, this look says, "God, I love my wife! She is so hot and I am so lucky!"

I think what people don't realize is they are missing out on a huge gift from God when they stop having sex. I am totally serious. To have the one you love inside of you and not to enjoy it means there is something wrong. Find the problem and fix it. God gave us sex to bring us closer to our significant other, and also to enjoy our bodies and our time here on earth. We were not given sex just to have children. If that was the case we wouldn't be able to have orgasms!

Try the candles, wine and sexy underwear. Go away for a night or a weekend. Start connecting physically on some level. If you need to just start holding hands again, then do it. You need to connect physically. Yes, Mark and I do have every other weekend without all the kids running around, but we make sure that we keep it fresh, new, sexy and alive. You cannot stop bringing new games to the playground. If you do, someone will stop showing up to play!

If you don't have time to fix your marriage, and your sex life, then you are missing out on a huge piece of what is important in life; keeping your most treasured relationship at the top of your list! Divorce is hell, it is hell on your children and all those around you. When you are in the midst of divorce you don't realize the strength of the hurricane you are trying to survive until the wind stops blowing! The hurricane is named, NOBODYWINS! Don't go there, and I am here to tell you, sex is a huge part of marriage, I have a book that will be out soon to prove it!

I am not writing about the other dimensions of marriage right now, I am writing about sex! Try it again. Give it another chance. You will feel alive, you will want to make the other aspects of your marriage even better once you connect on the physical and emotional plane of sex again!If you need to start out with hand holding or a hug, that is fine, just start, how about today?

Become An Organ Donor!

2009-07-30T16:32:00.000-07:00

Imagine this scene in your head; A man in one hospital bed is brain dead from a motorcycle accident. The family is gathered around this man. His wife is holding his hand begging him to come back, while his son is craddled in his mother's arm rubbing his eyes while tears stream down his face. The man's daughter is laying on his stomach with her arms tightly wrapped around his mid-drift. She is on her tippy toes because the hospital bed is so high and she is only eleven years old.

In the corner sits the mans father looking up at the ceiling. He is not crying, however, if you glance at his hands you know he is about to lose it. His hands are shaking so uncontrollably his daughter, the brain dead man's sister, walks up to her father and puts her arm around his shoulders and whispers in his ear, "It is okay to cry dad." Her tears are falling on her father's bald head.

The almost deceased man's mother is sitting in her wheel chair still in shock that she will bury her son before cancer takes her. She is staring at her son with deep saddness and regret. She never got a chance to say she was proud of him, even though he made choices she didn't agree with. Now it will be her son waiting at the gates of heaven for her arrival as soon as lung cancer claims her life.

The nurse comes in and says it is time. The wife screams out, "No!" The sister helps the wife, and the children are ushered out as the ventilator is turned off, he flatlines and all is quiet in the small hospital room, except for the sound of uncontrollable sobs coming from the family.

In a room a few floors down a family is staring at their beautiful daughter whom is going to die within two weeks if she doesn't get a heart. The daughter is unconscious. The parents are each holding one of her hands while her husband stares out the window at the rain pouring down wondering if he will ever be able to kiss his wife again!

He thinks of their four year old son at home and how hard it will be to tell his son that his mother is gone and he will never see her again. He goes over the conversation with his son in his head so many times that it feels as if his head will explode! How do you tell your child their mother is dead?

The woman's mother cannot imagine how she will bury her beautiful daughter. How is she going to make funeral arrangements. She is remembering the first time she held her daughter and what a beautiful baby she was. She remembers changing her diaper, rocking her to sleep, putting her hair in braids, her first day of kindergarten and her first day of High School. She remembers how beautiful she looked at prom, and her wedding. What will she do without her? How will she get through her days without their morning phone call?

The woman's father is remembering when he taught his daughter how to ride her bike. He remembers when they would get ice-cream together in the summer after watching their favorite team's baseball game. He remembers kissing her on the forehead every night before she fell asleep.

Time was running out. They were preparing for the worst when a nurse comes in and says "We found a match, your daughter is going into surgery now!"

The woman lived! She raised her son, she had another child, she talked on the phone daily to her mother, her father brought her and her son to baseball games and ice-cream in the summer, and her husband never had to tell her son he was motherless all because a man donated his heart!

Others would have lived because of his liver, his kidney, and someone could have gained sight because he donated his corneas. It is sad when a life is taken, BUT, how great is it that others can be saved!

Mark the organ donor box on your drivers license, it is the right thing to do!

TV Interview

2009-07-30T11:28:00.000-07:00

Please click on the link below to see my first TV interview. I was asked to be a guest on the show called A View From The Bay. I hope you enjoy the segment. Please send me any comments!

http://abclocal.go.com/kgo/story?section=view_from_the_bay/parenting_babies&id=6772404